- Sneezing while putting on mascara:
This situation usually goes like this: “Yasss, love this mascara, ugh yes perfect length, slayyyy bitch, ….oh no….don’t do it…don’t do it….*sneezes*…my life is over.
I don’t know about you, but I feel like this always happens to me at the most inconvenient times. It’s a battlefield trying to fix the repercussions of all the smudge underneath your eyes. In fact, it may be the most annoying thing to fix. I feel like once it happens, there’s no going back. You’re just going to have to rock that smudge underneath your eyes and convince the world that looking like Einstein is the new thing…so fetch! (Don’t listen to Regina George, yes you can make fetch happen!)
2. Lipstick on your teeth:
For some weird reason, no one has your back when you have lipstick on your teeth. Like come on ladies, let’s all be more connected and become a clan to help a lady out when they have lipstick on their teeth…. asking for a friend here.
Unlike the Einstein look, this one isn’t something you can rock confidently. You just look weird AF and this may be a girls’ worst nightmare if it happens on a first date, hence why we got to become a clan to make sure we’re there for each other when this happens. No one gets left behind, and every lady will be saved!
- Calculating when to text a guy back:
This situation usually goes like this: “Ugh, he hasn’t texted me in hourrrrssssss, *looks at the last time you texted him* …oh it’s only been 10 minutes. Alright, pep talk: you got this, you are a bad ass bitch, and any guy would be lucky to have you!!!… *more minute’s pass* okay, what the heck is his problem that he can’t text me right away, I deserve better. I am an independent woman and I don’t need a man to define me! *finally texts you back* YYAAAYYY, I love him. Ok, ok, ok…act cool. Don’t open it right away. He took forever texting me…14 minutes to be exact. Okay, I can’t open it just yet because then he will know I read it and that I’ve been waiting around for his response. Act cool, act cool, you’re cool….wait longer than him, you can text him 16 minutes later, because then you will win the battle of who takes longer to text! Another pep talk: YOU GOT THE WILLPOWER! *becomes impatient and opens* uhg crap, now what do I say…..*calls/texts her squad of friends to find the perfect response*
- When your crush snaps you, but you look like crap….
This situation goes more like this: *sitting in bed, comfy in pjs, no makeup on, no bra, Netflix on…life is gooood* “I am in my most zen moment right now, stress free, love life, ugh yes I need all the snacks in the world right now” *gets a snap from crush* NOOOO, shit, why is he asking me to see my face? It’s night time, shouldn’t he know it’s my bed time?
- The time you wait to let your nails dry after painting them might be the most stressful situation:
The whole ‘I’m a confident, I can hold my own, don’t need no one attitude’ quickly changes once a woman paints her nails. We are at our most vulnerable state until our nails dry. I think if you ever wanted to approach a woman, this might be a good time, other times I’d say watch out!
Thanks for reading! Hope this brought a little happiness to your Monday!
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